


fam forever (the group chat)

by mysticpendragon



Series: The Fam Group Chat Saga [2]
Category: Doctor Who (2005), Fam Group Chat Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Crack, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Breaking the Fourth Wall, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Everyone Is Gay, F/F, F/M, Group Chat Fic, Innuendo, M/M, MCYT reference, Plot and Crack, Running Gags, Self-Indulgent, Self-Insert, Sequel, Sex Jokes, Six the Musical References, Social Media, Sorry Not Sorry, This Is The Way, Twitter, in this house we love making one-off characters relevant, no beta we die like time lords, references to all of my hyperfixations, self-referential, she is returning, sometimes its relevant to the plot and sometimes its not, this is a dumping ground for my hyperfixations
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-05
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-17 10:34:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29224008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mysticpendragon/pseuds/mysticpendragon
Summary: DonnaNoble: So. Who was going to tell me that we’re in a TV showBillPotts: we’re in a fanficYazKhan: whatRoseTyler: technically we’re also in a sequel***The Fam is back! Things have changed drastically since that one fateful day when the Doctor made a groupchat for herself and her fam. Everything is different now – Yaz Khan now carries the burden of the Atlas, keeping the universe in balance; Graham, Ryan, and Jack are on the seemingly idyllic planet of Caelum helping people and sorting out fair play; and while she's got all of her closest friends and fam back, the Doctor can't help but feel more lost than ever before, even as she travels with River and the Space Gays. But there's still more in store for them – the mystery of Doctor Ruth, the young and awkward Fourteenth Doctor and his best mate Hugo, the chaotic Masters and their dastardly schemes, and the possibility that the Unravelling never ended...Also, everyone's gay, the Unknown Entity can't shut up, nobody can remember those two randoms on the group chat, Bill still hates bets, and Yaz is a Thirteen simp. Some things never change, even when others do. This is the way.(This fic isn't all that serious. I promise.)
Relationships: Amy Pond/Rory Williams, Ashildr | Lady Me/Clara Oswin Oswald, Heather (Doctor Who: The Pilot)/Bill Potts, Metacrisis Tenth Doctor/Rose Tyler, Original Male Character/Original Male Character, Thirteenth Doctor/River Song, Thirteenth Doctor/Yasmin Khan
Series: The Fam Group Chat Saga [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2115741
Comments: 15
Kudos: 16





	1. in which nobody has their shit together (including the author)

**Author's Note:**

> yes i am back on my bullshit x

**Fam Forever**

**BillPotts:** i can’t help but notice that this chat isn’t gay enough xx

 **RoseTyler:** tHIS is how you start a new fic??

 **BillPotts:** is there another way

 **RoseTyler:** valid continue

 **ClaraOswald:** guys.... rory actually is dream... holy fuck

 **RoryWilliams:** Who the fuck is Dream

 **RoseTyler:** HE’S EVEN DENYING IT KSDFJSKFJS

 **MarthaJones:** rip all the readers who know nothing about mcyt

 **AmyPond:** Oh well

 **AmyPond:** This is the way

 **RoryWilliams:** Im-

 **RoseTyler:** what

 **ClaraOswald:** what do you mean this is the way

 **AmyPond:** idk im just establishing a recurring gag

 **DonnaNoble:** So. Who was going to tell me that we’re in a TV show

 **BillPotts:** we’re in a fanfic

 **YazKhan:** what

 **RoseTyler:** technically we’re also in a sequel

 **DonnaNoble:** No, I said what I said

 **DonnaNoble:** We’re in a series called Doctor Who

 **Doctor13:** ahahahahahahahahahahaha

 **Doctor13:** very funny donna

 **DonnaNoble:** I have proof

**DonnaNoble sent attachment:** S11E01WomanWhoFellToEarth.mp4

**RoseTyler:** oh that explains missy’s whole attempt to give us a bootleg of the christmas special

 **ClaraOswald:** when was that again?

 **RoseTyler:** in the christmas special and the plumbella halloween chapter

 **LyndaMoss:** Hey hens

 **RoseTyler:** jESUS you scared me

 **AmyPond:** GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT

 **AmyPond:** sorry i’ve been watching a lot of the goes wrong show lately

 **AmyPond:** anyway hi new girl are you the doctor’s latest companion

 **LyndaMoss:** Oh not at the moment I’m dead

 **AmyPond:** lol same

 **LyndaMoss:** I plan to travel if Jack and River manage to figure stuff out on Spokania

 **RyanSinclair:** here we go again

 **BillPotts:** plot in the first chapter? in this economy?

 **AmyPond:** It’s more likely than you’d think

 **ClaraOswald:** hold on, wait for it

 **LyndaMoss:** ?

 **RoseTyler:** Wait for what

 **Unknown.Entity:** she is returning

 **AmyPond:** oh that

 **ClaraOswald:** There it is

 **BillPotts:** And right off the bat in chapter 1 too, how punctual

 **Doctor13:** 😏 😏 😏

 **Doctor13:** Pretend it’s an ‘I’m over this’ face, my emojis aren’t working

 **YazKhan:** you know doctor, emojis aren’t as effective when we have to imagine what they mean

 **Doctor13:** 😏 😏 😏 (pretend it’s a sad face)

 **YazKhan:** Case in point

 **BillPotts:** This is worse than the actual emoji bots we faced

 **ClaraOswald:** Emoji bots?

 **BillPotts:** yeah, they killed you if you weren’t happy

 **ClaraOswald:** Sort of like the Happiness Patrol then

 **ClaraOswald:** It’s a long story

 **RoseTyler:** soo... uhh

 **RoseTyler:** Anyone doing anything relevant to the plot

 **YazKhan:** not rlly no

 **Doctor13:** Just travelling with the Space Gays, fun times

 **LyndaMoss:** im just dead

 **RyanSinclair:** No offence but how can you text if I’m dead

 **LyndaMoss:** I’m Lynda Moss

 **RyanSinclair:** Point taken

 **DonnaNoble:** watching the telly

 **RoseTyler:** Which is code for ‘trying to uncover the Donna Noble Britcom Universe’

 **Doctor13:** the wot

 **RoseTyler:** oh, basically donna lookalikes are in a bunch of comedy shows so we’re hypothesising that it’s a parallel universe thing

 **Doctor13:** Oh like that parallel universe where I met Gandalf, Batman, and the emo from the Lego Movie, and helped them save the world

 **ClaraOswald:** Weird, Jack mentioned having a dream like that once

 **MarthaJones:** I’m surprised that this chat hasn’t devolved into absolute chaos yet

 **Unknown.Entity:** she is returning

 **RoseTyler:** yes, yes, we know

 **YazKhan:** You’ve been saying that for forever

 **YazKhan:** sorry i just can’t resist making musical references

 **MickeySmith:** So. I was watching some Twitch streams and I couldn’t help but notice that today’s PogChamp emote is the Doctor’s wot face

 **MickeySmith:** mind explaining

 **Doctor13:** Oh no

 **RoseTyler:** THE DOCTOR IS A TWITCH STREAMER??

 **RoryWilliams:** that makes two of us

 **ClaraOswald:** RORY IS DREAM CONFIRMED

 **Doctor13:** i-

 **Doctor13:** what was the account name

 **MickeySmith:** theoncomingstorm

 **Doctor13:** oh my god i’ve been found

 **YazKhan:** How did we not know this???

 **Doctor13:** bc you all never asked to help with “”””technical repairs””””” in the lower floors

 **RyanSinclair:** im-

 **Doctor13:** anyway here’s my friend code on acnh, friend me or you’re not fam anymore

**Doctor13 sent an attachment:** ACNHFriendcode.png

**RoseTyler:** just friended you ^^

 **YazKhan:** Too bad the readers can’t see it

 **Doctor13:** maybe if they survive the x reader chapter then i’ll give it to them

 **BillPotts:** Cheeky

 **AmyPond:** what is acnh

 **DonnaNoble:** it’s that game where you make an island or smthn

 **ClaraOswald:** Okay but. Among Us

 **BillPotts:** HELL YES

 **YazKhan:** Isn’t that only 10 people tho?

 **ClaraOswald:** Not the 23rd century reboot that supports virtual reality

 **BillPotts:** wicked

 **BillPotts:** Author, make a note of it, Among Us chapter

 **AmyPond:** hol up let’s keep track of the chapters we want author to write

 **AmyPond:** x reader, among us, anything else??

 **RoseTyler:** The DNBU (donna noble britcom universe) chapter

 **RoseTyler:** idk what else

 **BillPotts:** Marvel fic crossover explaining how Tony Stark ended up in this gc

 **ClaraOswald:** backdoor pilot chapter for a spinoff that will only reach 3 chapters

 **BillPotts:** coughs in that one abandoned space gays fic

 **RoseTyler:** chapter based on shit the readers want us to do??

 **YazKhan:** let’s be honest they’re going to make me rail the Doc

 **YazKhan:** which is honestly valid

 **Doctor13:** KSDFHSJFHDJHFGFHD

 **RoseTyler:** Thasmin rights

 **RyanSinclair:** Anyone notice how half of the chat is offline (coughs in Jack and River)

 **LyndaMoss:** weird

 **LyndaMoss:** aren’t they usually the most active

 **Unknown.Entity:** She is returning

 **YazKhan:** okay that’s it @Admin can you block that stupid fucking entity

 **YazKhan:** everytime you say she is returning a part of me dies inside

 **RiverSong:** I was summoned?

 **Unknown.Entity:** She has returned

 **Unknown.Entity:** This is the way

 **RoseTyler:** Not to sound dense or anything, but is the Unknown Entity still Bad Wolf

 **Unknown.Entity:** No

 **Unknown.Entity:** That is a mystery you and the readers will have to solve

 **AmyPond:** Oh no

 **Unknown.Entity:** want a hint?

 **ClaraOswald:** yes

 **Unknown.Entity:** well too bad you don’t get one

 **Unknown.Entity:** MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 **Unknown.Entity:** peace out, bITCHES

 **YazKhan:** So... uhhh guesses

 **Doctor13:** maybe one of the masters

 **BillPotts:** Could be

 **RyanSinclair:** I wonder if we’re ever going to get an Unknown.Entity reveal

 **Doctor13:** me too

 **Doctor13:** bet it’ll never happen though


	2. amy pond tries and fails to pretend that she didn't ship fezturion a lil bit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes

**Fam Forever**

**RoryWilliams:** hi um hello i don’t mean to be rude but why is the tardis at the back of our flat

**Doctor13:** oh oops i forgot to mention that

**Doctor13:** mind if we use your place as a parking spot for a bit? i’m travelling with clara and the space gays in her tardis at the moment x

**RoryWilliams** : yeah sure

**RoryWilliams:** not sure we had not much say in it

**AmyPond:** only if you come over for meals every week

**AmyPond:** idrc what face you’re wearing, you’re still our child-in-law and our best friend

**Doctor13:** im going to cry 😏 😏 😏

**Doctor13:** pretend it’s a happy emoji my emojis still don’t work

**MarthaJones:** Before we inevitably delve into the world of shitposting, @Doctor13 @YazKhan @GrahamOBrien @RyanSinclair how are you all holding up

**RyanSinclair:** It’s been a lot of work but it’s been great

**GrahamOBrien:** Never felt any closer to Grace since she passed.

**YazKhan:** surprisingly not that bad. still miss the doctor but hey at least i get to join the immortals club

**Doctor13:** been better but i’ll be fine again soon

**DonnaNoble:** Still trying to get readjusted to life with the Doctor back in the picture again

**DonnaNoble:** Although I will say that I know barely anyone here

**RoseTyler:** maybe we should have some kind of companion meetup?

**AmyPond:** Rory and I could totally host, and then pick up anyone who can’t come with the TARDIS

**Doctor13:** Am just now realising that you two basically have the keys to all of time and space

**RoryWilliams:** dont worry we’re responsible adults who would never steal a tardis

**Doctor13:** i feel called out here

**AmyPond:** good

**YazKhan:** Would love to go but am stuck on this planet :(

**RyanSinclair:** maybe we could zoom call in from here

**BillPotts:** quarantine vibes

**ClaraOswald:** omg

**RoryWilliams:** It’s settled then?

**Doctor13:** and just what am i supposed to do while you’re away? assuming @ClaraOswald @BillPotts @CaptainJack @Ashildr @Heather yall are going

**RiverSong:** We could always catch up without the younguns sweetie xx

**Doctor13:** sure

**CaptainJack:** Someone’s about to get wined and dined

**ClaraOswald:** IM-

**YazKhan:** not the doctor and river getting horny on main without me!!!

**RiverSong:** oh, i’m sure we can stop by caelum

**Doctor13:** yes ladies’ night out

**ClaraOswald:** you think im gonna let you run away with my tardis

**Doctor13:** yes

**Doctor13:** besides you can just borrow my tardis

**ClaraOswald:** touche

**ClaraOswald:** dw im not upset you go you funky gays

**RoseTyler:** Would probably help if we all knew where and when the Ponds lived?

**AmyPond:** yeah we’ll send that info along later

**AmyPond:** but make sure to rsvp later so we know how many people and who to expect!!!

**DonnaNoble:** I am definitely going along with my grandad

**RoseTyler:** WILF IS AMAZING

**Corin:** chef’s kiss

**Doctor13:** OHHH WILF I LOVE THAT GUY :’)

**Doctor13:** i would die for him

**Doctor13:** i did die for him

**Doctor13:** fun times

**AmyPond:** This took a dark turn

**ClaraOswald:** so did my life

**YazKhan:** uhh maybe let’s try for something a lil less sad

**YazKhan:** maybe which doctor got the most snogs from their fam

**ClaraOswald:** Oh, definitely 11. he probably didnt even realise how flirtatious he was sometimes

**RoryWilliams:** he kissed me once. kinda weird tbh

**AmyPond:** only because he was your son in law by then

**RoryWilliams:** we don’t talk about that

**Doctor13:** In my defence I kissed you because I was excited

**RiverSong:** Kissed the mum and the dad, Doctor you naughty girl

**Doctor13:** IM-

**CaptainJack:** lmao you’re beginning to sound like me

**Doctor13:** i am aren’t i

**CaptainJack:** it suits you

**RoseTyler:** Ok but has anyone met the Doctor and never once thirsted over even one version of them

**MickeySmith:** me

**RoseTyler:** alright fair enough

**GrahamOBrien:** I haven’t

**CaptainJack:** yet

**RyanSinclair:** I’ll admit I thought she was a bit of a looker at one point, but I’ve never thirsted for her

**YazKhan:** my name is literally ‘yaz thirsty for thirteen on main khan’ at this point

**RiverSong:** not me

**DonnaNoble:** I’ve never thirsted for her. Any version of her

**AmyPond:** I was so thirsty omg

**RoryWilliams:** i swear the number of times that we would play raggedy doctor. i was practically dying for a new game

**CaptainJack:** ‘raggedy doctor’?

**RoryWilliams:** her nickname for the doctor because when we met them he crashed on amy’s yard and his clothes were all worn

**RoryWilliams:** also he stripped in front of me once

**CaptainJack:** lucky

**RoseTyler:** wAIT WHAT

**AmyPond:** i was there too

**ClaraOswald:** omg same here

**DonnaNoble:** first time i saw corin he was naked as a babe

**AmyPond:** just for a bit of context he was changing clothes in front of us. bit awkward but i wasn’t complaining

**RoryWilliams:** I was

**DonnaNoble:** He’d just came out of the hand so I guess it makes sense

**ClaraOswald:** we were going to church

**YazKhan:** what

**AmyPond:** im- why

**ClaraOswald:** Idk but the church made us all get naked

**CaptainJack:** Now that’s my sort of church

**BillPotts:** Just when I thought it couldn’t get any weirder

**ClaraOswald:** yeah but then luckily he had this projector thing that made it looked like he was wearing clothes

**ClaraOswald:** of course the dumbass forgot to project it onto my family’s eyes so they’ve all seen him buck naked too

**Doctor13:** I’m sorry if I forget that I’m naked sometimes

**YazKhan:** LMFAO

**RoseTyler:** how

**Doctor13:** idek

**ClaraOswald:** i’m hungry

**ClaraOswald:** sorry meant to send that to the space gay tardis gc, i’m too lazy to go to the kitchen

**Doctor13:** i’ll fetch you something

**ClaraOswald:** IT BETTER NOT BE FISH FINGERS AND CUSTARD

**Doctor13:** beggars can’t be choosers, clara!

**AmyPond:** omg fish fingers and custard were cursed

**RoryWilliams:** Surprisingly not the worst thing ever though

**AmyPond:** Nah that would be that one dalek tempura River brought over once

**RiverSong:** dalek tempura is not everyone’s thing

**BillPotts:** omg we should play drinking games at the meetup!!!

**CaptainJack:** YES LET’S GET LIT I’LL BRING THE CYBERWHISKEY

**ClaraOswald:** Jack we’ll all be blackout drunk an hour in if you bring that

**ClaraOswald:** try something lighter

**MarthaJones:** Wait so we’re actually doing this

**BillPotts:** guess so

**CaptainJack:** Fine I’ll just bring something lighter like weeping angel tequila

**AmyPond:** I hate weeping angels

**CaptainJack:** Regular Earth drinks then

**CaptainJack:** so not fetch

**RoryWilliams:** Someone’s going to need a designated driver. We only have so many rooms in our flat

**AmyPond:** rory. my himbo husband. the tardis is bigger on the inside

**RoryWilliams:** oh

**RoryWilliams:** yeah

**RoryWilliams:** you’re right

**AmyPond:** i know

**Doctor13:** I entrust you, my parental figures, with the keys to my sweet ride and you rent it out to my mates as a guest room?

**AmyPond:** you know i lowkey shipped fezturion until you outright called us your parental figures

**AmyPond:** also awwww! it’s so cute that you think of us like that even though you’re like a million times our age

**RoryWilliams:** sorry but what is fezturion

**YazKhan:** tw: vulnerability

**BillPotts:** okay but the ratatouille musical actually slapped

**ClaraOswald:** I just watched it for the Six queens tbh but it was actually p good

**BillPotts:** REMY THE RATATOUILLE, THE RAT OF MY ALL DREAMS

**ClaraOswald:** I PRAISE YOU, OH RATATOUILLE, MAY THE WORLD REMEMBER YOUR NAMEEEE

**BillPotts:** theatre tiktok really popped off

**RoryWilliams:** can we get back to whatever fezturion is

**AmyPond:** fez + centurion, work it out

**RiverSong:** OMSFJSJFFDFG

**RiverSong:** Mother you’re almost as naughty as my wife

**ClaraOswald:** I’m lost

**RoseTyler:** yeah, same here

**RoryWilliams:** amy i-

**RoryWilliams:** is our marriage built on you shipping the doctor and i together

**AmyPond:** noooooo

**AmyPond:** ok maybe just a little

**AmyPond:** but come on, you gotta admit that you and the doctor had chemistry

**RoryWilliams:** Yeah but I only want to make a reaction with you

**CaptainJack:** omg

**RoseTyler:** Did Rory Williams just use a pickup line

**ClaraOswald:** He’s all grown up now :’)

**RoryWilliams:** i’m not a kid omg

**Doctor13:** i dont get fezturion

**Doctor13:** why

**AmyPond:** I mean. My two favourite boys (well, not anymore I suppose). I always hoped you two would get on well when I wasn’t there

**AmyPond:** alas i had the misfortune of travelling with two dumbasses who couldn’t function in the same room without me

**RoseTyler:** me with jack and the doctor

**MarthaJones:** also me with jack and the doctor

**RyanSinclair:** graham and i with yaz and the doctor

**Doctor13:** oi!

**BillPotts:** me with the doctor and nardole

**ClaraOswald:** me with the doctor and himself

**Ashildr:** honestly it would’ve worked with just you and the doctor

**Ashildr:** biggest dumbasses i’ve ever met let’s be honest

**ClaraOswald:** rude

**RoryWilliams:** Please tell me you didn’t write fanfiction about us

**AmyPond:** okay i won’t

**RoseTyler:** Did you though

**AmyPond:** i said i wouldn’t tell

**The Girls <3**

**amy:** I totally did

**rose:** HAHA ICONIC

**martha:** does the doctor know??

**amy:** OKAY FUNNY STORY

**amy:** he caught me writing one once and asked what i was doing

**amy:** i said “uhhh porn” and he turned as red as a tomato

**clara:** disaster immortal

**rose:** omg you did not!!!

**amy:** i did

**amy:** every time he saw me writing after that he went red and made a point of awkwardly asking rory if everything was okay between us

**bill:** LMAO

**bill:** were you though?

**amy:** Yeah

**amy:** we were separated for a while because we were both dumbasses who were so in love with each other that they gave the other up

**amy:** He wanted kids, I couldn’t have one, so we ended up splitting up

**amy:** actually it took the daleks to make us realise we were both idiots

**clara:** wait was that when you met oswin???

**amy:** wAIT YES

**clara:** coolio

**Fam Forever**

**ClaraOswald:** You can thank me all for keeping the Ponds together <3 you’re welcome x

**AmyPond:** BRUH

**RoseTyler:** LMAO

**RoryWilliams:** wait what

**AmyPond:** I was telling them about when we got divorced and the daleks brought us together again

**CaptainJack:** Ah, love in the midst of Daleks

**DonnaNoble:** wait did i miss that

**RoseTyler:** OH SHIT HOLD ON

**The Girls <3**

**< rose added** DonnaNoble  **to the chat. >**

**< rose changed** DonnaNoble **’s nickname to** donna **. >**

**donna:** what is this

**donna:** also why isn’t the doctor here

**rose:** because yaz simps for her here

**clara:** to be fair she simps for her on every chatroom she’s in

**yaz:** I feel called out and that’s not okay

**bill:** your middle name is apparently simps for thirteen, deal with it

**yaz:** okay but im not as Bad as you make it sound like i am

**clara:** ahem

**clara:** “If the Doctor railed me I would thank her and proceed to marry her, because she is my entire world”

**yaz:** okAY IM NOT ALWAYS THAT BAD-

**amy:** mate you’re whipped

**reinette:** She can’t help it, the power of le titty compels her

**martha:** I should introduce you to bill

**bill:** wot

**martha:** shit i forgot there’s a bill here too

**martha:** william shakespeare

**yaz:** you know shakespeare??

**martha:** yeah,, period typical racism and misogyny aside he’s a pretty fun bloke

**martha:** weird thing happened tho with queen elizabeth i, apparently the doctor is her mortal enemy??

**clara:** thats cos he shagged her

**amy:** IM

**amy** so much for the virgin queen

**clara:** thats what he said

**rose:** rip history, we hardly knew ye

**rose:** anyway the doctor is a chaotic hoe

**bill:** who isnt

**donna:** me

**Fam Forever**

**AmyPond sent a location.**

**AmyPond:** @everyone here’s our address, be here on the 10th february at 6:30pm or be square

**BillPotts:** aight

**ClaraOswald:** time scoop here we go

**Doctor13:** oh god the sheer chaos

**RoryWilliams:** I’m going to need a drink

**RiverSong:** i‘ve got you covered, daddy dearest

**YazKhan:** ISJDFGHSHDFHDF

**RoseTyler:** hell yes we’re gonna get LIT

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes the masters will be back


	3. claiming amatonormativity day for an obscure gay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> RyanSinclair: What if the Master made it
> 
> SonyaKhan: is that a bdsm thing
> 
> GrahamOBrien: He wishes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes this chapter is relevant to the plot. im also surprised.

**Fam Forever**

**BillPotts:** happy valentine’s day hoes

**BillPotts:** enjoy your amatonormativity

**AmyPond:** We will, thanks

**RoryWilliams:** also @everyone if you decide to visit us stay out of the bedroom

**Doctor13:** it’s getting  **✨** spicy  **✨**

**RoseTyler:** doctor no akdjfhdsjskdjfh

**Doctor13:** doctor yes

**RiverSong:** I see someone’s excited

**DonnaNoble:** ooookay now is when you get a fucking room

**Unknown.Entity:** he is returning

**Doctor13:** wot

**RoseTyler:** That’s new

**Corin:** if its my clone im going to sc r e am

**RiverSong:** Go ahead, sweetie

**Corin:** AHSDFDSHDFH

**RoseTyler:** hes taken and this fic isnt about to become a river song harem fic thanks

**YazKhan:** No, no, thats what the readers deserve

**LyndaMoss:** no they deserve the x reader chapter

**BillPotts:** How you doing (Y/N)

**RoseTyler:** they havent joined yet

**LyndaMoss:** oof

**DonnaNoble:** Anyone else hate how oversaturated the market is with romance and sex especially on today (Amatonormativity Day)

**Corin:** donna are you trying to say something

**DonnaNoble:** society has brainwashed us all to believe that we need a partner to be happy

**DonnaNoble:** also im a sex repulsed aroace (romance i’m okay with) :)

**Nardole:** dude same

**YazKhan:** 14 and hugo aren’t here, but 14 is an out and proud demiromantic ace and hugo has mentioned being ace and confused about whether they experience romantic or platonic attraction!!!

**YazKhan:** Also yes they gave me explicit permission to tell yall

**RyanSinclair:** I’m ace

**GrahamOBrien:** im biromantic demi

**LyndaMoss:** I’m an aro lesbian!

**RoseTyler:** Could you explain what that means? Just wanting to learn x

**LyndaMoss:** I don’t experience romantic attraction, but I’m sexually attracted to women!

**RoseTyler:** Wouldn’t that make straight women feel idk worried that youre being predatory? also, would that cause any problems if you were in a relationship with a woman??

**LyndaMoss:** No, being aro doesnt make me predatory, just means that theres a bit more communication to be had :)) that’s one big misconception a lot of aroallos face, so i see where you’re coming from! also, I might enter a platonic or queerplatonic relationship w/ another woman if I wanted to, and any sex-related things we would communicate about and assert boundaries 

**RoseTyler:** ohhh okay! thanks for educating me :))

**MarthaJones:** Same here, I didn’t know about all this stuff

**LyndaMoss:** ofc :))

**DonnaNoble:** This fic is saying no to amatonormativity x

**DonnaNoble:** also. even for singles and ppl going thru recent breakups this day is hard

**YazKhan:** It’s the commercialisation of everything love related for me

**Doctor13:** am demisexual and demiromantic, but other mes have been on different ends of the aro and ace spectrums

**Doctor13:** like. fez boy was aroace, rock star was alloace, and apparently twink me is demiromantic ace

**Doctor13:** regeneration doesnt just change your idea ab your gender identity mates

**Doctor13:** anyways valentines day should be about celebrating whatever makes YOU happy, not necessarily love! some ppl dont experience love and thats ok!! it doesnt make you heartless or broken, just means that you work differently and see the world differently from others :))) and if you want to celebrate yourself, or a partner, or just the idea of love, thats ok too!!! valentines day is a human concept and its honestly a really westernised one too

**RoryWilliams:** hey sorry if this is off topic anyone want to come flower collecting w amy and i??

**RoryWilliams:** taking the tardis to the netherlands for a quick lil adventure

**AmyPond:** aww look at you getting acquainted to textspeak

**AmyPond:** also anyone???

**Doctor13:** Ooo i wanna come!!

**DonnaNoble:** I’ll go

**RoseTyler:** we’d go but corin and i are spending our day with my parental units and tony :)

**MarthaJones:** Mickey and I are going out

**ClaraOswald:** Space Gays x Earth Companions let’s go

**MadameVastra:** Jenny and I would love to go, if someone’s able to pick us up

**CaptainJack:** You’re all going to be surprised but I have no plans

**Doctor13:** GET OUT

**Doctor13:** why not?

**CaptainJack:** idk. just not feeling it this year

**RoseTyler:** You should come hang out with us!

**CaptainJack:** Nah I kinda wanna avoid the coupley stuff this year, sorry

**RoseTyler:** No worries

**MarthaJones:** Hey, you should go drop by Sarah Jane’s! She mentioned that Luke and Sky were both going out with their boyfriends, so it’ll just be her, the computer, and K9 tonight

**CaptainJack:** Ohh thats a really good idea!!!

**CaptainJack:** Thanks Martha :) am going to drop by Bannerman Road

**RoryWilliams:** gonna pick up Donna and the Paternoster Gang, meet up w the Space Gays somewhere in Amsterdam, 2021?

**Doctor13:** sounds good

**YazKhan:** Isnt there a pandemic

**RiverSong:** not in this universe

**RiverSong:** there WAS one in the pandemic chapter, but otherwise not

**YazKhan:** uhh guys not to cause panic on this calm day but

**YazKhan:** my sister wants to join the fam group chat

**RoseTyler:** WHAT

**RoseTyler:** Sorry that sounded aggressive lmao

**BillPotts:** add her. the chaos will make her want to leave

**< YazKhan added SonyaKhan to the chat.>**

**YazKhan:** please do not fuck shit up sonya khan

**SonyaKhan:** ....

**SonyaKhan:** Hey sisters James Charles here

**SonyaKhan:** who’s ready to hoe it up

**BillPotts:** Half the people in this group chat

**SonyaKhan:** niceee

**YazKhan:** the bar was on the floor

**SonyaKhan:** Oops i must’ve stepped over it

**Doctor13:** Hello Sonya

**SonyaKhan:** Hello Yaz’s girlfriend

**YazKhan:** SONYA SHFHSHF

**YazKhan:** WE’RE NOT OFFICIAL

**Doctor13:** yeah shes on a different planet and im in a time machine with space gays

**YazKhan:** WAIT DOCTOR NO

**SonyaKhan:** wait yaz you’re not on earth??

**YazKhan:** No please dont tell mum and dad

**SonyaKhan:** only if you let me stay here

**YazKhan:** ugh fine

**Unknown.Entity:** He is returning

**SonyaKhan:** Who’s that

**YazKhan:** our resident annoyance

**TimeCrack:** Guys do you think that the unknown entity has feelings

**Doctor13:** ... it does?

**Unknown.Entity:** He is returning

**SonyaKhan:** Is that some sort of bot or something?

**Doctor13:** omg why have we never thought of that before

**RyanSinclair:** What if the Master made it

**SonyaKhan:** is that a bdsm thing

**GrahamOBrien:** He wishes

**RiverSong:** ... hold on.

**sExIeSt gRoUpChAt eVeR !!! lolz**

**ActualPsycho:** Hello hoes

**ActualPsycho:** Happy Amatonormativity Day, anyways, anyone know how to code a bot?

**PMSaxon:** Shouldn’t you already know if you’re our future self?

**ActualPsycho:** Well, I’ve forgotten how much of an arse you are, so do you really expect me to remember everything x

**ScaryPoppins:** yes i once coded a bot to irritate everyone who mentions the doctor in a groupchat. dont remember what happened to it

**MasterBait:** Funny

**ScaryPoppins:** Not funny dear. Sexy.

**ScaryPoppins:** anyways subscribe to me im close to overtaking dream

**BDSpyM:** HOW

**BDSpyM:** your videos are hardly creative content

**ScaryPoppins:** mCXSCUSE ME BITCH

**ScaryPoppins:** That is so not sexy of you

**SexyChilde:** stop trying to make sexy happen. it’s not going to happen

**MasterBait:** I feel like Mean Girls gets referenced every four chapters

**SexyChilde:** What? It’s a good movie

**BDSpyM:** wait @SexyChilde did you change your name??

**SexyChilde:** cant blame me for being a tartaglia simp

**BDSpyM:** Not you being a Genshin Impact fan!!!

**SexyChilde:** anything wrong with that teletubbies fan

**BDSpyM:** ... no

**SexyChilde:** i thought so

**SexyChilde:** bitch

**PMSaxon:** Haha you like teletubbies??

**BDSpyM:** you cant talk you tried to take over keeping up with the kardashians

**MasterBait:** AHSDFDSHD I REMEMBER THAT

**The Camera, like on The Office**

**BillPotts:** I don’t, but they don’t need to know that.

**Fam**

**RiverSong:** so unknown.entity might actually be a bot missy made

**Doctor13:** oh great

**Unknown.Entity:** He is returning

**RoryWilliams:** Who

**Doctor13:** my will to live

**Doctor13:** hahaha just a joke

**SonyaKhan:** Ooo is it Boris Johnson?

**RoseTyler:** NO NOT THAT SKANK ASS BITCH

**AmyPond:** in this house we hate boris johnson and the tories

**AmyPond:** and before you clown around in the comments consider the fact that this entire fic series so far has been blatantly gay, anticapitalist, and shits on the tories from time to time

**BillPotts:** fuck the tories we hate the tories

**BillPotts:** Starving children

**Unknown.Entity:** He is returning

**MarthaJones:** anyone want to make bets?

**BillPotts:** NO

**DonnaNoble:** 5 quid it’s the Twelve lookalike from Pompeii

**Doctor13:** it’s gonna be the pregnant guy from the tsuranga

**RiverSong:** My ex husband King Hydroflax

**AmyPond:** tall large henry viii, supreme head of the church of england

**BillPotts:** eww who

**ClaraOswald:** the eleventh doctor

**RoryWilliams:** my dad

**AmyPond:** winston churchill

**YazKhan:** Dan Newcompanion

**Unknown.Entity:** He is returning

**SonyaKhan:** kanye west

**LyndaMoss:** georgenotfound

**RyanSinclair:** Tommyinnit

**RoseTyler:** The kid the Doctor and I met when we met the Wire

**< Unknown.Entity added TommyConnolly to the chat.>**

**TommyConnolly:** hi

**RyanSinclair:** wait this isnt tommyinnit is it

**RoseTyler:** no wait

**RoseTyler:** @TommyConnolly arent you the kid I met in 1950s london? when the tvs came alive and there was that lady sucking peoples faces in

**RoseTyler:** @ the rest of you hoes that was not an innuendo

**TommyConnolly:** oh yeah hey hows it going

**RoseTyler:** good! got sent to a parallel universe for a few years but then the Author fucked shit up and now im back in 2021

**TommyConnolly:** cool same

**TommyConnolly:** im gay so some random thing calling itself the unknown entity sent my mum and i to 2021 and helped us resettle

**BillPotts:** Nice you’ll fit right in

**BillPotts:** im fairly sure there are no cishets here

**Doctor13:** ehh never checked but im sure you’re right

**Doctor13:** Anyway hello Tommy!

**TommyConnolly:** hi

**LyndaMoss:** ohhh nice another one off character we’ll never see in the canon show again!

**DonnaNoble:** Oh nice new people

**YazKhan:** something tells me this kids going to get along well with 14 and co.

**DonnaNoble:** honestly the next tardis team is just going to be chaotic gays with one person holding the brain cell

**RyanSinclair:** So like every other TARDIS team

**RoseTyler:** quick someone make a list of everyone who’s held the brain cell

**TommyConnolly:** rip

**BillPotts:** uhh how would we know

**ClaraOswald:** hold on

**RiverSong:** clearly whoever wasnt the doctor

**AmyPond:** and i oop

**RoryWilliams:** The vibes we’ve created today are immaculate

**AmyPond:** good try honey

**MarthaJones:** any team i was on i held the brain cell

**ClaraOswald:** aight i have just consulted! she says rose held the brain cell when it was her, 9, and jack. martha had it on every team that she’s been on, except for when the earth got stolen, donna had it then. rory had it when it was her and the ponds, even if river was there. no one had it when it was fez boy and i, but we switched it around from time to time when it was 12 and i. bill had it when it was her, 12, and nardole, even if nardole thinks otherwise. graham had it when it was the fam, and now that it’s the space gays its a tie between bill and i. 14 gave me a text and said that he and his other fam exchange it between each other but hugo normally has it

**Nardole:** I had the brain cell no matter what the Doctor thinks

**BillPotts:** lies

**RiverSong:** So we’ve all just agreed to call 11 fez boy?

**Unknown.Entity:** he has returned. she is returning. he is returning. they are returning

**TommyConnolly:** Wait is that -- nani the fuck

**Unknown.Entity:** yes it is i the Deus Ex Machina Plot Device MacGuffin™

**Unknown.Entity:** because author is lazy

**BillPotts:** this chapter is six pages long on google docs already

**Unknown.Entity:** thats hyperfocus for you

**TommyConnolly:** Ah we love a good hyperfocus

**DonnaNoble:** So we just got home from getting tulips in the Netherlands and uhh the Tenth Doctor is here??

**DonnaNoble:** apparently he came from spokania and he wanted to spend amatonormativity day with his best mate

**ClaraOswald:** aw that’s sweet

**RyanSinclair:** WAIT FUCK SPOKANIA IS STILL RELEVANT??

**Unknown.Entity:** never stopped being relevant

**RoseTyler:** oh shit

**TommyConnolly:** Wait what’s Spokania?

**BillPotts:** apparently a selfcest orgy

**Unknown.Entity:** All you know is a lie

**SonyaKhan:** Oh shit this is better than that episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians where harold saxon shut up

**MarthaJones:** What?!

**RiverSong:** ah yes that

**BillPotts:** He mentioned that in the master chat

**RoseTyler:** WAIT WHAT WHATS HAPPENING WHAT IS THE PLOT

**Unknown.Entity:** she is returning

**LyndaMoss:** what the fuck my front door security camera got broken??

**RoseTyler:** arent you dead

**LyndaMoss:** Ahh shit I was supposed to keep the cover up :/

**LyndaMoss:** ye i was given this phone after spokania happened and then sent to 2021 so. yaz and i both know what happened

**RoseTyler:** what happened

**LyndaMoss:** The Beginning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> self care is bringing back obscure characters that you liked :) kudos to me for giving myself the doctor who i deserved
> 
> also that was not supposed to be plot im-
> 
> anyways happy amatonormativity from your local aroace


	4. not only is it aro week, but also arthur week!!! (aka: i wrote myself into my own fic, deal with it)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> RoseTyler: Right, this chapter is getting too meta even for this fic
> 
> ArthurSantos: Alas we cannot dwell on my existence for too long this chapter is about celebrating being arospec
> 
> Doctor13: OH WAIT YES ITS ARO WEEK I FORGOT-
> 
> YazKhan: im-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its aro week!!!! woohoo i think this is actually the first one for me since i started id'ing as aro?? anyways double upload today bc am working on multiple fics at once (hopefully itll actually happen) but uhhh cinderella retelling + mcu/wap/ouat fic updates + more future chapters makes for a Very Busy Hugo™
> 
> also this chapter is supes self indulgent and i dont think its plot heavy so youre fine to skip to the next chapter, i mostly just wrote this for me xx
> 
> uhh also last thing but wandavision episode 7 spoilers???

**Fam Forever**

**< Unknown.Entity added ArthurSantos>**

**ArthurSantos:** hey hens

**Doctor13:** wot

**ClaraOswald:** who are you

**ArthurSantos:** the author’s self insert, local cryptid, and partner-in-convenient-plot-devices of the Unknown Entity

**TommyConnolly:** why are you here

**ArthurSantos:** tis aro week

**BillPotts:** Why didnt we just summon the twink and his “”””best mate”””””

**ArthurSantos:** doesnt fit the plot

**TommyConnolly:** And you do?

**ArthurSantos:** touche

**ArthurSantos:** i’ll be relevant soon anyways once you find out the ✨ Great Secret ✨ 

**RoseTyler:** Oh no is there another new plot

**ArthurSantos:** no, i have Interrupted It for aro week

**ClaraOswald:** Why do you sound like some omnipotent being

**ArthurSantos:** spoilers

**RiverSong:** That’s my line, sweetie

**ArthurSantos:** also dont worry about this plot it wont be mentioned for another two chapters because this chapter was written after the next two chapters seeing as it was quickly realised that putting this after the next storyline in time for aro week would mess up the nonexistent upload schedule

**BillPotts:** in english pls

**ArthurSantos:** this fic is written in a random order

**RoryWilliams:** Sorry have just joined, did the Unknown.Entity change their nickname

**Unknown.Entity:** she is returning

**RoryWilliams:** Ah I see it hasnt

**ArthurSantos:** hello! am your friendly neighbourhood eldritch being!! also hugo warner’s cousin or twin brother or smthn idk

**ArthurSantos:** our only relation is that we are both the author’s self inserts

**RoseTyler:** Right, this chapter is getting too meta even for this fic

**ArthurSantos:** Alas we cannot dwell on my existence for too long this chapter is about celebrating being arospec

**Doctor13:** OH WAIT YES ITS ARO WEEK I FORGOT-

**YazKhan:** im-

**SonyaKhan:** Wait what’s this about a self insert

**RoryWilliams:** oh, author inserted themselves into the fic (again)

**ArthurSantos:** it was either that or retcon a bunch of characters

**BillPotts:** My head hurts from reading this

**ArthurSantos:** mine hurts from writing this

**Doctor13:** wot

**ArthurSantos:** wot

**LyndaMoss:** is that your real name??

**ArthurSantos:** who knows

**RoseTyler:** The World Health Organisation?

**AmyPond:** this chapter isnt funny this entire convo is giving me a headache and its not from tears of laughter

**ArthurSantos:** im sorry :)

**TommyConnolly:** im- what???

**Unknown.Entity:** she is returning

**Doctor13:** Is that even a plot or is that just a recurring meme that is going nowhere

**Doctor13:** @ArthurSantos

**ArthurSantos:** not telling x

**BillPotts:** does this chapter have a point or can we go back to wondering who the fuck is returning this time

**MarthaJones:** Its gonna be the cat nun from New Earth and she is going to turn out to be the inspiration for Cats the Musical

**RoseTyler:** NO

**ClaraOswald:** @ArthurSantos you are not allowed to do a cats chapter

**ArthurSantos:** rude

**BillPotts:** Wait @ArthurSantos are you the author??

**ArthurSantos:** yes i have descended down to the earthly level of this fic to cause ✨ Chaos ✨ 

**TommyConnolly:** good job you’ve done it

**RoseTyler:** You should go to sleep and maybe this will be funnier if you write it later instead of now

**ArthurSantos:** hold up lemme think

**ArthurSantos:** nah where’s the fun in that

**RoseTyler:** the readers crave laughter

**BillPotts:** (Y/N) do you crave laughter or author self inserts??

**AmyPond:** they havent joined yet :(((

**RiverSong:** Soon............

**BillPotts:** oh no

**YazKhan:** kinda feeling intimidated here

**JackHarkness:** Soon............

**Doctor13:** creepy :-O

**AmyPond:** not the nose!!!

**TommyConnolly:** This is more chaotic than the chat on one of Rory’s streams

**ClaraOswald:** Oh my god he actually is Dream

**BillPotts:** yes....... we’ve already established that.......

**TommyConnolly:** noah fence but how is this chapter celebrating aro week

**ArthurSantos:** You know come to think of it idek we kinda covered everything last chapter

**ArthurSantos:** I guess aro pride??? like. i personally enjoy not being romantically attracted to anyone

**ArthurSantos:** flert is noe for me

**TommyConnolly:** f l e r t i n g

**< ArthurSantos changed RoryWilliam’s nickname to dreamwastaken.>**

**ArthurSantos:** ghsgdgdshg now i have to tag this as a mcyt fic

**dreamwastaken:** w h y

**TommyConnolly:** omg

**AmyPond:** IM-

**BillPotts:** sheer chaos

**ArthurSantos:** thats my name, don’t wear it out

**BillPotts:** I thought your name was Arthur?

**ArthurSantos:** ye that and hugo but thats not relevant to the plot right now

**ClaraOswald:** you should delete this chapter

**ArthurSantos:** why i need to plant some more seeds for a future plot point

**DonnaNoble:** Yeah, and I’m gonna meet Lauren Cooper a few chapters from now

**dreamwastaken:** I want to change my nickname back

**ArthurSantos:** not yet i havent decided if you are or aren’t fgc!dream

**YazKhan:** ... you know this isn’t the fam group chat discord right??

**ArthurSantos:** yes there has been no gay chaos and also no demons have been summoned yet

**Ashildr:** Hello sisters

**ClaraOswald:** you spoke too soon

**ArthurSantos:** oops

**dreamwastaken:** This AU isnt fun

**ArthurSantos:** who said this was an au

**RoseTyler:** OH GOD THIS CHAPTER IS CANON W H Y

**BillPotts:** WAIT THIS IS CANON???

**ArthurSantos:** i mean........ all 3 chapters of this fic so far have been canon.......

**ArthurSantos:** also i need your opinion. i have multiple hyperfixations going on at once. should i expand the chatverse

**TommyConnolly:** yes

**BillPotts:** no!!!!

**TommyConnolly:** think of the crossovers

**AmyPond:** Lol imagine if we had lookalikes in the other fics and we met them

**ArthurSantos:** no comment

**RoseTyler:** This chapter is so pointless

**dreamwastaken:** Is inserting yourself a fic a sign of a big ego or smthn or what

**ArthurSantos:** idk i might delete this chapter

**ArthurSantos:** or make us all pretend this doesnt exist

**TommyConnolly:** Wait we should talk this through

**TommyConnolly:** in my short time in this fic its been?? a mess??? like is a relevant self insert that isnt hugo warner actually that much compared to the rest of the fic???

**TommyConnolly:** i mean. the next plot is literally so far-fetched, we keep referencing a donna noble britcom universe, i (an obscure caracter from 2006) am friends w bill potts, there’s going to be an x reader chapter, and the fourth wall doesnt exist

**ClaraOswald:** true

**RoseTyler:** Arthur you should replace the Unknown.Entity

**Unknown.Entity:** she is returning

**ArthurSantos:** ok im going to sleep so if this chapter gets funnier from this point forwards it because i got ✨ rest ✨ 

**CaptainJack:** Make it funny by having a conversation w your other self insert

**ArthurSantos:** w h y

**ArthurSantos:** hes not even supposed to be here yet

**RiverSong:** youre not even supposed to be here period

**AmyPond:** OOF

**dreamwastaken:** River that was very rude of you

**RiverSong:** oop

**BillPotts:** gUYS IT WAS AGATHA ALL ALONG

**AmyPond:** NOOOO IM NOT CAUGHT UP YET

**RoseTyler:** guys what if we’re inside the hex

**MarthaJones:** DONT EVEN GO THERE

**dreamwastaken:** Oh no what did I miss

**CaptainJack:** WandaVision episode 7 came out

**RiverSong:** oh rip thats definitely going to get referenced in the marvel fic

**YazKhan:** The what

**RiverSong:** the marvel cinematic universe characters have their own fanfic

**YazKhan:** WHAT

**ArthurSantos:** Oh, you’ll be meeting them soon xx

**YazKhan:** SHIT WHAT

**RoseTyler:** WAIT WHAT

**DonnaNoble:** W H A T

**dreamwastaken:** i thought we already met them??

**ClaraOswald:** Oh yeah Tony Stark was in this group chat

**Doctor13:** my head hurts im gonna sleep

**Twitter**

**14th doctor stan** @hugowarner

uhh happy aro week may you enjoy your representation

|

**arthur** @mysticpendragon

@hugowarner our what

|

**Captain Not Agatha** @jackharkness

@mysticpendragon IT HAPPENED

|

**Witchy vibes only** @agathaharkness

@jackharkness Twas me all along

|

**wicked always wins** @zelenamills

@agathaharkness who tf are you

|

**WandaVision star** @wandamaximoff

@zelenamills dont worry i got this handled

|

**14th doctor stan** @hugowarner

@zelenamills @wandamaximoff @agathaharkness can you please not derail my tweet

**hugo warner stan** @thedoctorofficial

Good morning to everyone but especially to my fellow arospecs. We are beautiful and powerful and our voices are so so important. Never let yourself believe that you are broken because you are whole and you are magical xx #aroweek2021

|

**arthur** @mysticpendragon

@thedoctorofficial this

|

**I survived Big Brother** @lyndamoss

@mysticpendragon @thedoctorofficial i love this so much, happy aro week to you!!

|

**hugo warner stan** @thedoctorofficial

Also just wanted to add that not every aro/arospec person is asexual, and not every aro/arospec person is or wants to be in a qpr/qpp

**Fam Forever**

**ArthurSantos:** well this has been a productive but not very funny chapter

**ArthurSantos:** anyway might fuck around and do an aro retelling of cinderella

**ArthurSantos:** and then send yall to an alternate universe or start another ✨ plot ✨

**RoseTyler:** oh no

**dreamwastaken:** Wait can you repeat that last one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you read through this whole chapter youre a real one thanks for putting up with my self-indulgent self-inserts. some boys dont want sex they just want to travel w the doctor and cause chaos xx
> 
> also dISCLAIMER that is not my name as it appears on legal papers i just used my other primary name and added a random filipino surname because i am, in fact, a pinoy


	5. viva la france, land of le titty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> RoseTyler: Also @MadameDePompadour le titty??
> 
> MadameDePompadour: oui
> 
> MadameDePompadour: c’est la vie, bonjour la titty
> 
> AmyPond: does that even mean anything
> 
> MadameDePompadour: that’s for me to know and you brits to find out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fun fact ive been working on this chapter since like. before i even wrote the last chapters of the original fic. needless to say many adjustments have been made

**Fam Forever**

**MadameDePompadour:** viva la france

**MadameDePompadour:** land of le titty

**MadameDePompadour:** in other words, i am very much pan

**MadameDePompadour:** say no to historical accuracy, that was a parallel universe

**YazKhan:** one of us, one of us

**RoseTyler:** anyone feel like there’s more plot coming?

**Unknown.Entity:** she is returning

**MarthaJones:** Yes, yes we know

**RyanSinclair:** you’ve been saying that since the first fic

**BillPotts:** Sometimes I forget we’re in a sequel

**YazKhan:** We’re in a wot

**BillPotts:** author needs to make up new recurring gags honestly

**CaptainJack:** aye

**AmyPond:** Im-

**CaptainJack:** ??

**AmyPond:** nothing dont worry

**BillPotts:** that was weird

**YazKhan:** Not as weird as the universe frog

**ClaraOswald:** the what

**RyanSinclair:** We went to another universe and the universe turned out to be a frog because my dead gran liked frogs

**RyanSinclair:** im pretty sure that’s what the doctor said

**RoseTyler:** Oh that explains that weird frog thing she was talking to

**RoseTyler:** Also @MadameDePompadour le titty??

**MadameDePompadour:** oui

**MadameDePompadour:** c’est la vie, bonjour la titty

**AmyPond:** does that even mean anything

**MadameDePompadour:** that’s for me to know and you brits to find out

**BillPotts:** ASJDFSHDSDFSHDF

**Doctor13:** wot is happening in here

**BillPotts:** gay chaos

**RoseTyler:** Just us getting down from the high from the companion meetup

**Doctor13:** Oh yeah how was that

**AmyPond:** gay

**BillPotts:** chaotic

**YazKhan:** sorta like this groupchat

**GrahamOBrien:** Remember when this group chat was normal

**GrahamOBrien:** Oh wait

**RyanSinclair:** mate it’s been weird since river song joined

**RiverSong:** I was called?

**RyanSinclair:** ye we were talking about the sheer chaos of you joining the fam gc back in the first chapters of the first fic

**TommyConnolly:** Wait what fic

**YazKhan:** oh yeah you’re new

**YazKhan:** basically we’re all in a fanfic sequel

**SonyaKhan:** Wait I did not consent to being in a fanfic

**YazKhan:** too bad

**Doctor13:** Yaz, Ryan, stop scaring the newbies by reminding them we’re in a fanfic

**TommyConnolly:** as long as its not wattpad im fine

**LyndaMoss:** *shivers in the wattpad corp fiasco of 2095)

**YazKhan:** the WHAT

**LyndaMoss:** in 2095 (this is like. ancient history for me) wattpad corp becomes the biggest distributor of media and basically everything gets oversaturated with overrated bad boy romances

**CaptainJack:** sounds like my cup of tea

**LyndaMoss:** you’d totally like the interactive smut

**Doctor13:** okayyyy let’s not go there

**CaptainJack:** No, no, let her continue

**LyndaMoss:** ... i’d rather not

**AmyPond:** what the fuck even is the future

**MadameDePompadour:** A strange, strange world full of le titty.

**MadameDePompadour:** *cut to the space gays chat*

**Space Gays**

**SpaceBicon:** is it just me or is this fic slowly getting more and more meta

**SpaceBicon:** like at first the fourth wall was a thing, and then it got destroyed, and now it’s pulling a wandavision

**SpaceBicon:** like @LeTitty how did you even do that??

**LeTitty:** I’m Madame de Pompadour

**HelloBenjamin:** hello that is my line

**ThirteenSimp:** give it up river everyone uses it these days

**ImABillever:** Wait Yaz is that you??

**ThirteenSimp:** ye my name used to be officerbi but i changed it because acab

**< TommyConnolly and RoseTyler joined the chat.>**

**CaptainJackoff:** eyyy

**CaptainJackoff:** also i changed my username too ;)

**ImABillever:** yes i can see that

**SpaceBicon:** @TommyConnolly @RoseTyler @RoryWilliams @AmyPond yall need to change your names

**< RoseTyler changed their name to SoftBi>**

**< AmyPond changed their name to TheGayWhoWaited>**

**< RoryWilliams changed their name to NotDreamWasTaken>**

**< TommyConnolly changed their name to tommy>.**

**SpaceBicon:** illegal

**< tommy changed their name to CloraOosweld>**

**SpaceBicon:** i hate you

**CloraOosweld:** you and my dad

**SoftBi:** @NotDreamWasTaken youre not fooling anyone

**NotDreamWasTaken:** I am not Dream

**TheGayWhoWaited:** sureee

**SoftBi:** author should just tag dream on the ao3 tags lol

**ThirteenSimp:** ships: dream (minecraft youtuber)/amy pond/fez boy

**TheGayWhoWaited:** I wish

**NotDreamWasTaken:** IM-

**CaptainJackoff:** Ooh ships!

**CaptainJackoff:** Is it too cliche to say I ship myself and the 10th doctor

**SoftBi:** yes

**ThirteenSimp:** i ship thasmin

**SoftBi:** valid, continue

**CaptainJackoff:** This is not wlw mlm solidarity

**CloraOosweld:** no but bill potts and i are

**ImABillever:** there is a new member in my anti-betting cult

**SoftBi:** your WHAT

**CloraOosweld:** hello

**ImABillever:** no betting allowed in my gay christian server 😤

**TheGayWhoWaited:** lmao you owe me 10 quid rory

**ImABillever:** NO

**ThirteenSimp:** LMAOOO

**CaptainJackoff:** tommy join the right side before it’s over

**CloraOosweld:** no 😌

**SoftBi:** It’s not too late to be a better!

**CloraOosweld:** no thanks

**ImABillever:** stay strong, tommy! the force is with you!

**CloraOosweld:** and with ur spirit x

**ThirteenSimp:** Nope nope this is not literally a Christian server

**SoftBi:** no it is a land of the Gay

**NotDreamWasTaken:** Bill seeing betting: “I wanna see white flags! White flags at dawn!”

**CloraOosweld:** d-dream??

**CloraOosweld:** i am in the presence of ✨ royalty ✨

**NotDreamWasTaken:** read my username twink im not dream

**CloraOosweld:** lies

**ThirteenSimp:** No he is dream he has like 20352934853 trillion subscribers or something

**ImABillever:** something some of youse wouldnt know about

**CloraOosweld:** hes dream until proven otherwise

**TheGayWhoWaited:** SHIT this has been fun to watch but our dog patches needs a walk :)

**SpaceBicon:** ... you’re shitting me

**ImABillever:** @CloraOosweld have you picked a side

**CloraOosweld:** im sorry bill ... but i have joined the betters

**CloraOosweld:** i guess

**CloraOosweld:** ... it was never meant to be

**The Camera, like on The Office**

**BillPotts:** Fuck my life. Fuck Tommy Connolly. Fuck Rory Williams and his MCYT ass bullshit. They’re all shitting me. I am fucking gA M E D OUT.

**sExIeSt gRoUpChAt eVeR !!! lol**

**MasterBait:** fuck rory williams and his dream ass bullshit

**ScaryPoppins:** RORY WILLIAMS IS DREAM???

**ScaryPoppins:** who the fuck is rory williams

**MasterBait:** oh shit wrong chat ignore that heehee

**MasterBait:** would be very sexy of you to ignore that

**ScaryPoppins:** oh no honey you cant just turn the sexy against me

**SexyChilde:** oh shit shes angey

**BDSpyM:** Missy right now:

**ScaryPoppins:** bitch

**MasterBait:** Rory is not Dream

**< MasterBait sent an attachment:** Roryisnotdreamwastaken.png **>**

**ScaryPoppins:** oh ok

**ScaryPoppins:** i am all better... for now >:)

**BDSpyM:** aren’t you a fun one

**ScaryPoppins:** I am! Thanks for noticing

**BDSpyM:** /s

**ScaryPoppins:** bitch

**BDSpyM:** But a sexy bitch

**PMSaxon:** Oh no she’s going to go off at you

**ScaryPoppins:** honey I’M the only sexy bitch

**ScaryPoppins:** you got that, punk?

**BDSpyM:** .. y eah 

**SexyChilde:** yikes!

**Fam Forever**

**TommyConnolly:** Is @RoryWilliams dream or not i need to know

**Unknown.Entity:** she is returning

**TommyConnolly:** thanks unknown entity, very cool

**RoseTyler:** We really dont know

**MadameDePompadour:** who is returning????

**BillPotts:** if yall place bets i am fucking leaving this gc

**Doctor13:** fine! harsh

**RoryWilliams:** can confirm that dream exists

**ClaraOswald:** yes queen! give us nothing!

**LyndaMoss:** Anyone else think she is returning soon

**RyanSinclair:** feels like that chapter 13 debacle again

**YazKhan:** Oh yeah, from when Rose came back

**GrahamOBrien:** The plot feels much faster now.

**Doctor13:** not a good thing

**CaptainJack:** Ye probably would be good if there were no plot

**RoseTyler:** wouldnt we just sit around here doing nothing then

**SonyaKhan:** you mean thats not what you ppl already do?

**YazKhan:** mcxcuse me

**SonyaKhan:** i said what i said no cap

**Doctor13:** anna oop

**AmyPond:** who do people think is returning

**MarthaJones:** I’m fairly sure we bet on that in the anniversary chapter

**LyndaMoss:** just checked, ye we did

**RoseTyler:** Anyone else feel like it’s too... quiet??

**Twitter**

**[REDACTED]** @unknownentity

she is returning #1984

|

**Dr. Martha Jones** @marthajones

@unknownentity spooky

|

**Captain Jack-off** @captainjackharkness

@unknownentity what the fuck

|

**bad wolf** @rosetyler

@unknownentity jUST SAY WHO IT IS ALREADY

|

**disaster gay** @tommy_connolly

@unknownentity shfhshf is2g if it’s the wire-

|

**not dreamwastaken** @rorywilliams

@unknownentity This whole thing is absolutely mad, can it over yet

|

**potts** @bpotts

@unknownentity WHO IS IT

|

**Save Our Children!** @wapofficial

@unknownentity This is why our children must be protected! They end up in plots! -Mod Sylvia

**fourteen** @thedoctorofficial

i wont spoil it for you all pasties but. you might want to turn your tv on if you need a hint ;)

|

**disaster gay** @tommy_connolly

@thedoctorofficial omg it IS the wire

|

**bad wolf** @rosetyler

@tommy_connolly @thedoctorofficial OH HELL NO I DID NOT LEAVE THE PARALLEL UNIVERSE FOR THIS

|

**gay chaos** @famgroupchatdiscordserverofficial

@thedoctorofficial just sipping the tea, enjoying the time travellers’ chaos

**Gayvengers Assemble**

**TonyStark:** yall hear something

**IronLad:** n-nani?

**scarletwitch:** the sweet sound of a ✨ crossover ✨

**PeterParkour:** the unravelling part 2

**IronLad:** Cosmic rewind baby

**BlackWidow:** crossover much

**scarletwitch:** it’s getting d o w n

**TonyStark:** thats the sound of a plot thickening

**Unknown.Entity:** she is returning

**IronLad:** bitch get out

**PeterParkour:** byeeeee

**The Wilfred Association of Parents**

**SylviaNoble:** This new plot is dangerous and we need to protect our kids!

**JackieTyler:** agreed. i’ll grab my guns

**RoryWilliams:** You two know you sound like republicans, right?

**JackieTyler:** gotta blast them all

**FrancineJones:** I highly doubt that there’s going to be another Dalek invasion.

**GrahamOBrien:** Eh, you never know. Might be a safe bet.

**Unknown.Entity:** she is returning

**SylviaNoble:** Oh, shut up!

**Fam Forever**

**Unknown.Entity:** she is returning

**BillPotts:** bitch we already know

**Doctor13:** YOURE GOING TO THE EEBY DEEBY

**YazKhan:** YEET

**RoseTyler:** w hat

**CaptainJack:** am : confusion

**MarthaJones:** Guys, no one pranked me, right? Because my windows just got broken

**AmyPond:** yeah someone shattered our car door

**BillPotts:** Someone spray painted ‘EVICTED’ on our TARDIS

**Doctor13:** what the fuck is going on??

**LyndaMoss:** Idk but it’s getting creepy

**CaptainJack:** im kinda getting chills

**LyndaMoss:** No, same here

**RoseTyler:** I feel like whoever it is... they are coming

**Unknown.Entity:** she is returning

**Unknown.Entity:** she is returning

**Unknown.Entity:** she is returning

**< [REDACTED] joined the chat.>**

**[REDACTED]:** Hello, naughty children. It’s murder time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> no i am not referencing chapter 4 until chapter 7 at the very earliest, youre welcome x


	6. i bet you werent expecting THIS!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> BridgetSinclair: im sick
> 
> EltonPope: Sorry mate, football’s on tonight
> 
> [REDACTED]: That’s alright. Just peer into the screen one more minute! yes... yes...........

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> welcome to the most bizarre storyline in the fgcverse so far!!! which is saying a lot honestly. dont worry its gonna be over way quicker than you'd expect

**[A long time ago, in a universe far, far away...]**

‘The threads of time have been unravelled,’ an ethereal voice said as it looked through scenes of the Doctor’s life and the lives of those they’d met, sifting through it as if it were a silky substance. ‘And things are not as they were meant to be.’

**London Detectives Club**

**EltonPope:** Guys who’s ready for tonights meeting

 **ColinSkinner:** Idk guys, it’s all been in good fun but I think we should branch away from the Founder

 **BridgetSinclair:** ye kinda weird that we’ve all been listening to a computer

 **Bliss:** So we’re all going to just stop listening to Her, right?

 **UrsulaBlake:** Agreed.

 **BridgetSinclair:** I feel kinda shady, you know? Like, this was supposed to be fun, but now it’s... just... weird

 **EltonPope:** And what’s with that ‘vote Saxon’ thing?

 **ColinSkinner:** Exactly! This isn’t supposed to be political

 **Bliss:** This doesnt feel right

 **UrsulaBlake:** yeah i get what you mean.

 **Bliss:** I don’t think it was meant to be this way. I don’t think we’re supposed to be like this.

 **EltonPope:** yeah. it’s like... what if the doctor messed with our timelines? so that we break up before we can find him?

 **BridgetSinclair:** I don’t like where this is going...

 **EltonPope:** What if... what if everything we know is a lie?

**Unknown.Entity deleted 14 messages.**

**[REDACTED] has joined the chat.**

**[REDACTED]:** Hello, everyone! I hope you’re ready for tonight’s meeting! I found some cool new evidence you may all like.

 **ColinSkinner:** Actually, I’ve got a lecture I need to go to tonight. Sorry!

 **Bliss:** my friend got stood up, i need to help her out

 **UrsulaBlake:** Sorry, I forgot about the meeting and signed up for a clean up project! x

 **BridgetSinclair:** im sick

 **EltonPope:** Sorry mate, football’s on tonight

 **[REDACTED]:** That’s alright. Just peer into the screen one more minute! yes... yes...........

* * *

**London – the 1950s**

Magpie Electrical had been abandoned ever since the Doctor had come by to visit, but even still, passing by it gave Tommy Connolly an unsettling feeling. He kept to himself, pulling the hat further down his head and shoving his hands down the pockets of his trenchcoat. He looked around warily. The neighbourhood bullies had caught wind of his crush on one of his classmates and had almost beaten him up. It was only by the grace of some woman with short blonde hair calling herself ‘Joan Smith’ that he’d managed to get away. When he’d tried to thank Joan, she’d merely shrugged, said, “just paying back an old friend”, and left. Those bullies were still roaming the streets – and he wasn’t safe.

He got back home, half-expecting his mum to be watching a bit of telly, but the house was dark. He opened the door and went in. The whole place had been ransacked. Couches were overturned, chairs knocked to the ground. His eyes widened. A scream came from upstairs, and he rushed up the flight of stairs until at last, he found his mother and grandmother, cornered by some dark figure.

‘Hey!’ He exclaimed. ‘Come pick on someone your own size!’

The figure turned around to reveal a man with sandy dirty blond hair with no face. He froze in his tracks as the man advanced on him. He stepped back slowly, shaking his head in disbelief. It couldn’t be. The Wire couldn’t be back.

‘Take him,’ a feminine voice said sinisterly. Before the man could get him, however, he froze, as did his mother and grandmother. Everything was frozen – except for him.

The front door opened, and Tommy rushed downstairs. A figure was there in the doorway, their clothes a blatant giveaway that they weren’t of this time. They wore a red hoodie and dark blue jeans, but their whole body seemed to be nothing but glowing white light, as if this were some sort of spirit or... _entity_.

The unknown entity spoke. ‘Come with me, Tommy Connolly. Bring your family. There is a better time waiting for you. It is not safe yet.’

‘Who _are_ you?’

If the entity could smile, they would. ‘You’ll find out soon.’

* * *

 **New York – the 1930s** **– moments after the Ponds’ departure**

The woman growled as she looked around the home. It had been recently vacated – she was minutes too late. River Song had taken the Ponds to Caelum, and she’d missed them, having hoped to hitch a ride. Alas, she was forced to continue jumping around with the vortex manipulator, hoping to end up in the same time as the Doctor. She cursed to herself. If it hadn’t been for that stupid twink and his band of gremlins, she would’ve gotten her revenge for being disintegrated all those years ago. Did Rose and the Doctor really think that reassembling yourself and undoing all the work you’d done to disguise yourself was _that_ easy? She scoffed.

She entered a new set of points on the manipulator. First, she needed to check up with her loyal underlings, that little group of London detectives determined to find the Doctor – they’d been doing the brunt of the work of finding them for her. Then, she was going to take a stop at 1950s England – perhaps if she nipped one of the flowers in the twink’s bouquet of companions in the bud, then she wouldn’t end up where she was, unable to directly enter the Doctor’s timestream anywhere and anywhen.

She had work to do.

* * *

**The Game Station, many years into the future**

Captain Jack Harkness was back. While he wasn’t quite willing to dwell on the specifics of it all, he and River had finally done it – they’d found a way to bring the dead back to life, although it did have its limitations. He took the drive that he’d been storing Lynda Moss’ consciousness on – taken from the Testimony’s memory banks and a few seedy places here and there – and walked down what used to be the Game Station. At last, he’d found the place where she died. He took out a vial of nanogenes and let them out, allowing them to copy his DNA while preventing them from copy the immortality portion. A few moments later, the nanogenes had repaired her, and he’d restored her consciousness.

‘Jack...?’ Lynda said. ‘What happened?’

‘Uh... basically, you died, but you were one of the ones on the list that They told us to use,’ Jack said. ‘Basically, you’re meant to be alive.’

‘Where’s the Doctor? And Rose?’

‘Far away from here. But don’t worry. They’re both fine now.’

‘And you?’

‘I died here too, but... now I’m immortal.’

Lynda smiled at him, squeezing his hand. ‘Thank you.’

‘Right. Well. You do gotta keep this a secret.’

‘I can do that.’

He smiled. ‘Good Lynda Moss. The Doctor said you were sweet.’

‘Yeah, he did. Sweet Lynda with a y. Not to be confused with Linda with an I – forcibly evicted for damaging property.’

‘Oh yeah? What’d she damage?’

‘Security camera. And when they evicted her – rumour was that she brought in some device and tried to destroy the dis – transmat beam too.’

‘Huh. Wonder what happened to her.’

* * *

‘It didn’t have to end this way,’ the Fourteenth Doctor said, his companions off to the side, keeping their distance respectfully. ‘Regenerate. Please. You’re – you’re one of my oldest friends.’

‘Why do you still try, Doctor? Even when your own best mate tells you not to? When everyone wants you to stop?’

‘Because I love – I _loved_ you.’

‘And I loved you. But things are different now. Nothing will ever be the same, _twinkie_ , and you need to accept that.’

‘Fine. I – I will. And I can’t – I can’t see another way I can live without – without knowing that I’ll never have to see you again.’

‘What are you talking about?’ she asked furiously, even as the golden shine around her began to brighten as she began to regenerate.

‘From now on, you’ll never be able to follow me around – not at least, unless you end up in the same time as me – although you’ve never been patient, so I suppose I’ll be fine. You will never see my past faces or this face, or my future faces, ever again.’

‘Who are you doing this for?’

The Doctor’s face was impassive. He spread the dust he’d gotten a long, long time ago around her, and the golden sheen turned red. She writhed even as she regenerated into her new form, and she watched as he left her there to change. The Doctor went back into the TARDIS and closed the door, resting against it. Donna, Lynda, and Tommy went back to their rooms, but Hugo stayed, watching him.

‘Did I make the right choice, Hugo?’

Hugo shrugged. ‘I can’t answer that for you, Thete. I’m sorry.’

* * *

**The River of Memories, Caelum**

She looked at the river, fresh out of her last encounter with the Doctor. She looked at it. His name. The endless song, bound in a story, woven throughout time. Guarded by a guardian who would faithlessly stay with him for the rest of time. This was the way the story was – and this was where she wanted to begin. She’d been trying to track him down – find a way to make amends – to go back to who she was when she’d fallen, a long time ago on the Mondasian ship with her past self. Playtime was over. She couldn’t keep pretending that she didn’t love him back. As a friend. As family, even.

And that’s when the transmat beam took her to the Game Station.

* * *

**Fam Forever**

**Doctor13:** who the hell are you and what do you want

 **TommyConnolly:** oh no not her

 **YazKhan:** Do you know her?

 **TommyConnolly:** shes the reason im here in the first place

 **RoseTyler:** Well, aren’t you going to introduce yourself?

 **ClaraOswald:** cant wait to see who won the she is returning bet

 **BillPotts:** youre all horrible

 **BillPotts:** especially you tommy i thought we had something SPECIAL

 **TommyConnolly:** you thought wrong

 **YazKhan:** wait tommy who is she

 **TommyConnolly:** Shes the Wire

 **Doctor13:** didnt we destroy the wire

 **TommyConnolly:** she came back somehow

 **[REDACTED]:** Oh, it was hard. But that’s a spoiler for you xx

 **RiverSong:** Get out.

 **[REDACTED]:** Ooh, spicy much, Mrs. Song?

 **[REDACTED]:** Or is it Ms. Song now? I doubt the next Doctor wants to be married

 **Doctor13:** Leave them both out of this. What do you want?

 **[REDACTED]:** Revenge, dearie. And the satisfaction of knowing I got around the Doctor’s little plans.

 **YazKhan:** all talk and no play arent you

 **TommyConnolly:** no shes rlly dangerous

 **SonyaKhan:** Wait. you’re the one who was behind the linda disappearance, weren’t you?

 **Doctor13:** WAIT WOT

 **SonyaKhan:** yeah! i was researching you and apparently back a few years ago, a group called linda that was basically a cult just disappeared! and their computer was burnt

 **RoseTyler:** Wait, but that’s not what happened... right?

 **Doctor13:** what if the unravelling never ended??

 **Doctor13:** what if it just... changed?

 **ClaraOswald:** ... oh shit

 **YazKhan:** @[REDACTED] who the fuck are you???

 **[REDACTED]:** Oh, alright

 **[REDACTED]:** Some know me for destroying property

 **LyndaMoss:** OH FUCK I KNEW IT

 **[REDACTED]:** Some call me Linda

 **CaptainJack:** OH SHIT

 **RoseTyler:** WHAT

 **[REDACTED]:** But you can call me the Mistress.

**< [REDACTED] changed their name to LindaMistress.>**

**LindaMistress:** That’s right, bitches. I have returned.

 **Doctor13:** ... oh shit.

 **MarthaJones:** YES I WAS RIGHT

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow is that l o r e in a gay group chat fic?? colour me stunned x
> 
> also oops i kinda retconned tommy's explanation of how he ended up in 2021... or did i
> 
> last thing -- get ready!! the x reader chapter is Happening Soon


	7. masterful plot, well done author x

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> BDSpyM: hIIII LINDA
> 
> LindaMistress: hi tentacle boy
> 
> BDSpyM: byeeee loser

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol i forgot this chapter was supposed to come out today

**Fam Forever**

**LindaMistress:** so. any questions?

**TommyConnolly:** Why did you go after me

**LindaMistress:** all in good time, dearie.

**TommyConnolly:** then whats the point of asking

**Doctor13:** what happened to you

**LindaMistress:** well. eventually i become the mistress, but before that, kid you decides to fuck me over. now we’re here. go thank a twink

**BillPotts:** thanks @TommyConnolly

**TommyConnolly:** for what

**BillPotts:** exactly

**TommyConnolly:** rude

**LindaMistress:** any others

**RoseTyler:** Nah I think we’re good

**dreamwastaken:** anyone watch the bachelor last night

**ClaraOswald:** Is there even a season going on right now???

**AmyPond:** maybe in the dnbu

**TommyConnolly:** The what

**AmyPond:** Donna Noble Britcom Universe

**SonyaKhan:** wait i’m in the presence of famous people???

**YazKhan:** yes, don’t let your ovaries explode

**LindaMistress:** Come on, people! Ask me questions!

**TommyConnolly:** Anyone else hear crickets

**BillPotts:** me

**dreamwastaken:** yeah same here, i dont know who was talking just then

**LindaMistress:** You’re all horrible people

**RiverSong:** thank you

**DonnaNoble:** Oi I’m trying to get some shit eye what is going on here

**AmyPond:** shit eye

**YazKhan:** IM-

**DonnaNoble:** oh my god

**Doctor13:** Wait what happened

**DonnaNoble:** I was trying to say ‘shut eye’ but i ended up writing it as ‘shit eye’

**RoseTyler:** rip you

**BillPotts:** why the fuck did i just walk into the doctor using a banana in ways that bananas should never be used

**AmyPond:** eww

**dreamwastaken:** Doctor oh my god

**Doctor13:** I’m sorry if bananas are sexy

**Doctor13:** Dear God I sound like Missy

**DonnaNoble:** disgusting

**BillPotts:** Ikr

**TommyConnolly:** thanks i hate it

**MarthaJones:** same here

**MarthaJones:** Was bad enough when pinstripes would do... things to his bananas

**MarthaJones:** ... and then eat them

**BillPotts:** Okay tmi

**RoseTyler:** i didnt need to know that and @Corin you better not be doing that

**Corin:** Okay i’ll try to stop

**DonnaNoble:** NO WAY

**CaptainJack:** I see the banana is very strong in the Doctor

**LindaMistress:** If you could stop discussing the Doctor’s sex life and start discussing me, that would be absolutely dandy!

**SonyaKhan:** honey nobody cares about you xx

**YazKhan:** ouch

**AmyPond:** rOASTED

**LindaMistress:** have it your way, hoes

**_< LindaMistress has left the chat.>_ **

**BillPotts:** byeeee

**sExIeSt gRoUpChAt eVeR !!! lolz**

**_< LindaMistress joined the chat.>_ **

**LindaMistress:** hello bitches it’s me linda

**ScaryPoppins:** Honey idk who you are but if you’re not sexy i don’t give a shit

**SexyChilde:** that intro was very unsexy

**LindaMistress:** bitch

**PMSaxon:** Someone hasn’t been having a good chapter

**LindaMistress:** i hate everyone

**BDSpyM:** hIIII LINDA

**LindaMistress:** hi tentacle boy

**BDSpyM:** byeeee loser

**ScaryPoppins:** oUch you got frickin BDSM to hate you???

**ScaryPoppins:** so not sexy of you

**LindaMistress:** i’ll show you sexy

**GameMaster:** save me the eye bleach, i’m not interested

**ScaryPoppins:** Sorry, you can never match my level of sexiness

**MasterBait:** do you rlly have nothing better to talk about missy

**PMSaxon:** No, lady me is determined to become either a YouTube sensation or an immature ten-year-old boy

**MasterBait:** would be the most perfect karma if we ended up regenerating into a teenager considering we make fun of 14 for it all the time

**ActualPsycho:** haha twinkie boy

**BDSpyM:** lmaoooo

**SexyChilde:** why would we need to regen into a child i’m already the child of the chat

**PMSaxon:** I’ll believe that when you change your... disturbing nickname.

**_< SexyChilde changed their name to Thotschei.>_ **

**Thotschei:** happy

**PMSaxon:** A bit better

**PMSaxon:** Twink

**Thotschei:** bitch

**MasterBait:** Okay that’s enough fighting

**ScaryPoppins:** i dont like the energy we’ve created in the studio today

**LindaMistress:** Well, maybe you should be kinder.

**ScaryPoppins:** bitch

**The Camera, like on The Office**

**BillPotts:** i swear im going to leave this chat one day

**Fam Forever**

**RoseTyler:** Does anyone else find it weird that the entire Linda Missy plot is just... over now??

**AmyPond:** ye

**TommyConnolly:** oh thank god

**DonnaNoble:** so uhh what’s next then??

**ClaraOswald:** unrelenting chaos probably

**Unknown.Entity:** they are coming

**dreamwastaken:** Well that’s not foreboding at all

**Doctor13:** huh, that’s new

**RiverSong:** Who are they?

**Unknown.Entity:** they are coming

**SonyaKhan:** suddenly this is Not Fun anymore

**LyndaMoss:** the linda with an i plot must’ve been a diversion then

**RoseTyler:** but from what?

**Doctor13:** I don’t think we want to know

**Unknown.Entity:** they are coming

**Unknown.Entity:** they are coming

**Unknown.Entity:** they are coming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uhh things to look forward to -- ch 50 special is next chapter,, x reader chapter is coming up,, and then a big big... Event
> 
> also dont forget that a strange town awaits
> 
> and yes i did end the linda mistress plot as quickly as it began oop

**Author's Note:**

> we have a discord if you didnt know! invite link is https://discord.gg/ufTEdWM
> 
> also there will be plot, just not yet

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [The Pride Room Chat.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29757039) by [EmilyJ](https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmilyJ/pseuds/EmilyJ)




End file.
